It’s not about me

That statement is so loaded for me on many levels. Over the last couple of weeks I’ve realized my running is not about me. At least the marathon training part. The base camp training, I thought it was. Many of runs had the I can’t mantra and what was I thinking starting this. I am an injured person could never run a day before 3 years ago and that start was awful. I’m the slowest in my group and I just don’t know that I can do 26.2 miles. I mean seriously what was I thinking.

Then my first 1/2 was upon me. I was terrified. I went to this meeting a couple days before the race. It was the kick off party for world vision and the speakers talked from their hearts about their why. I was so inspired.  I was going to do this race not for me but the kids- I’m passionate about kids. The 1/2 got downgraded to a 5k, which was a bummer since I was finally siked enough for it.  But it was perfect for my training so I let it go. I had a friend tell me I inspire them and they want to run next year with me.

The next day at yoga, I found out that I was part of the reason someone decided to push themselves farther and do the marathon. I realized that although I’m slow and I’m not skinny, that I’m inspiring others to go farther and do better. This is totally NOT about me.  Last night in Bible Study, there was a verse that we reviewed. And it was another reminder that my job here isn’t to think only about me and I want but how I can help the world. (Think David)

I’m going to sponsor a girl through World Vision to have that constant reminder that this is not about me at all.

I’m going to leave you with this Bible verse today as it has really spoken to me recently:

Jeremiah 6: 16 This is what the Lord say:

Stand by the roadways and look
Ask about the ancient paths:
Which is the way to what is good?
Then take it and find rest for yourselves.
But they protested, “We won’t!”

Sending All My Love!
Now tell me your story-

I don’t wanna

This was my attitude today. I sat on my staircase going back and forth making every excuse to not run.

I haven’t slept well in a couple of days
It’s a time of day where more people will see me
I can do later this evening- I should just work on the front yard
My legs are sore from working out yesterday

When I had turned my music back off and thought about how many times that I didn’t really run later or make it out there. I stood up and walked outside and just went. The hill is always first thing out of the house. I started out a bit rougher than I normally do. But I kept going. The wind was awful, which normally throws me offbeat. I can’t breathe running like that. But guess what I kept going.

I decided to run to the pond instead of the way I was going to go. When I got there, I ran it twice. My thought was, I knew that I was not going to run as far as I wanted to. So this got me that little bit further. And then I ran an extra block when I got back to my neighborhood. OH and the hill after the pond, it was hard and I had to walk more than I wanted at that time.

But I have to say, I made it where I wanted and what was awesome about it all. When I got home, I checked my miles and they were all even. I’ve never done that! I usually run my first my mile fast, mile 2-3 are usually a little slow and from there even slower. Sometimes I’ll speed it up here and there but I’m never even. Every mile was about the same. Amazing.

So my point is go out there conquer the miles and kick arse doing it. I didn’t run as fast as I would have liked but it was truly awesome what I did accomplish!

Sending All My Love!
Now tell me your story-

What was I thinking

I seriously think this almost every time I run. I mean if I struggle with this 2 miles, 6 miles or whatever I just did today, how the heck am I going to do the 13.1 in 3 weeks or the marathon. I mean really, 26.2 miles. My God, yup my God. And I say to myself, He is the one that placed it on my heart that day in Church and I know He will be the only one to pull me through.

So how do I keep going? Well it helps that I have to beat myself. I’m not in competition against anyone else (I just don’t want to be last). I’m in competition against myself so today my 2 mile run was better than my Saturday group run, which lets talk about that.

Okay, I really sucked on Saturday. I mean I probably know people who walk faster than I did those 2 miles. Every single person who ran with me was at least 1/8 of a mile a head of me. I just couldn’t run. I don’t know why exactly. I mean probably the fact that my headphones didn’t work right away- duh should have made sure everything connected before starting. So I started really slow, then allergies and the cold got to me while taking off. But here’s one thing that was really awesome about it. I’m going back next week. Sure I was upset that I was so bad but I survived being last and I know I can do better so I will keep going. It is great being part of a group for running. I am thinking about joining a 2nd group that goes out on Tuesdays and that will balance out my week.

Psalm 9:10, “Those who know your name will trust in you, for you, LORD, have never forsaken those who seek you.”

Sending All My Love!
Now tell me your story-

A common way that we sin

1 Corinthians 8:12- You are sinning against Christ when you sin against other Christians by encouraging them to do something they believe is wrong.

This about this verse for just a minute. Meditate on it and tell me what comes to you. It is important that we all understand that each verse in the Bible speaks to us as different parts of our life in different ways. We do don’t all get the same interpretation as the next person. They will be similar but will mean something different.

God gives us each our own paths and what is His calling for one is not His calling for another. Again, some people may have a similar path- such as a calling to be a Pastor- but they don’t have the same road map at all. That is why we each have our favorites to listen to. One may draw me in more while the other is driving you.

So now to what this verse made me think of today. Stephen Hawkings passed away recently and wow all the judgment on that man for not being a believer. It is not our place to judge him and maybe this is a bad example as according to him, God had no leading in his life. But I still believe God was there. He was a miracle- he was not to live as long as he did and his brain- wow! Okay, so I wish he could have seen God in his life here and maybe he did before he left this earth but we do not know God’s judgement on him so we must not judge. Do not bully someone after they passed.

Okay so now on to what else came to mind while reading this verse for me. Social media really as a whole. News stories with a response section as well. I’ve seen how much these things light up with responses because people strongly don’t believe the same way as another person. Every single one of our presidents are great examples on this. Now I’m not saying we don’t have a right to discussion on the topic but we judge the person’s path while discussing what they are doing. We need to stand up to a change that will affect the greater mass in a negative way- yes. But all the name calling and bullying that goes on with it- is what NEEDS to stop.

Christians get a bad name for doing this. The ones who like to say someone is finally rotting in hell because they didn’t believe- what??? Or that another person is going to hell for living their lifestyle that is definitely not a calling for them. Or they call them names based on some biased opinion. Those who cast the first stones…. We need to stop doing this. Yes God has his set of rules and yes we need to follow them but when it comes to our paths and interrupting scripture, we each have our place and we shall not judge or tempt the other person into doing what God has called them to do. We can only follow our path and share Jesus’s great love with others. Can you imagine being able to walk His path and be as kind and loving as He was when on this earth? It would be so beautiful. Yes, we are sinners and would never be able to be as perfect as He was/is but we can strive every day to live our lives in a way that is pleasing to Him.

Sending All My Love!
Now tell me your story-

Running for a cause

Okay for the last 2 weeks I have wanted to get in front of a computer to blog but wow does life get in the way. 🙂

So 2 weeks ago, I wanted to tell you how bad not stretching is for you.  As you know, I typically yoga before and after a run and on my “rest” days. Well that 1 week, I just didn’t have the time. Found myself running in more ways than 1 and not having time to stretch much (yoga is more than that but for this week…). Well come Monday after that morning run- oh my was a I sore. I started a new to me app- Nike + Run. But I did not run anything that was much different that week from normal.

I came to realize how important stretching or my yoga really is. I don’t get sore- sore. I get that oh my I worked out sore a bit but not that I can’t move sore when I do my yoga. Funny thing is yoga makes me so much stronger so I can feel that workout sore from that too. I love it! And will not risk that again.

So I mentioned the app- Well I have to tell you how much I love this app- seriously! I have slowed way down which is a bit uncomfortable, especially at first but it’s made me a better runner. I can run for longer times and my sprints are getting much faster. I love it! seriously to the point I am obsessed. lol

So tonight was the big really learning about what I am doing by signing up for this race with world vision. I learned about the cause more. So there are kids that have to walk miles for clean water. They talked particularly about this one girl who is now 13. She has been walking since she was 4- 3 miles to get dirty water every day for her family. She risks so many things in this walk- animal predators and people ones. Scary stuff. I learned that it only took $50 to get her clean water for a lifetime. This is what I am doing raising money for kids like her to get water- no clean water, not the dirty stuff that kills 800 children a day!- for a lifetime. I don’t know how I could have said no- 26.2 miles- I said never. Well here is never and I am going to kick never’s Arse!

If you want to sponsor me-  https://www.teamworldvision.org/participant/106684

Whatever you can do helps- 5 people donating $10 would get that water for one for a lifetime so that is just a start. I want to get water for 200 kids. That is saving the lives of 1/4 who pass away each day from dirty water! Crazy. But there are so many others running with me. One person cannot do it all but together we are a beast and we will tackle it together. Thank you all for your support- love to you!

Sending All My Love!
Now tell me your story-

Failing Forward

It is an interesting concept, isn’t it? Taking your failures and using them to kick butt moving forward. Talk about motivation to get back out there and go. This past season, I promised myself that I wouldn’t let it get bad. As soon as the cold weather hit, I got a gym membership. I started going. Problem- I could NoT get my eating under control.

So it’s just Thanksgiving, okay just a couple weeks until Christmas and so on. Then the exercise lessened. Do you ever feel like when it is cold out that you just cannot do anything but cuddle under a warm blanket and drink something warm? Oh I’m such a sucker for this. Throw in some Gilmore Girls or Harry Potter and I won’t be moving for a week.

So I knew I’ve gained back some of my weight. Yesterday I forced a weighin with measurements and pics. Oh how I hate that scale! So yes, I’m back where I started (well almost). And we are talking like 2 years ago!!! I really had a tougher year in general- seriously this weight gain was more over the last 9 months or so.

The measurements hurt a bit (and if I was still getting measured by a trainer, I probably would have cried). But my pics weren’t horrible. I can tell in the mid-section so much but my face hasn’t really returned yet so there is still hope.

Seeing all this- I have 2 options

  1. Crawl back in the hole that has been keeping me warm this winter
  2. Kick Arse and get this back on track now

fun fact: husband is on board so will make it easier. We are trying the Paleo diet for 28 days and will assess and decide if we need to add any foods back sticking to a clean diet mentality or if we will continue mostly with Paleo. I’ll try to post updates on the food too as we go. Alright off to the gym!

Sending All My Love!
Now tell me your story-

Mortality

Over the last week or so, I have watched a friend go through the hard times of watching her mom in the hospital and eventually her gate was open to walk with Jesus. Her family was close by and it looks like they made so many wonderful memories in the hardest of times. Many times I found myself crying even though I never met this family because I understand so well what they are going through.

I remember that summer before thinking mom had a look in her eyes like she knew her final days were coming soon. I told my husband, we don’t have long with mom, maybe 6 months. He said, “Really?” and didn’t see what I saw but knew that we were close and sometimes I just know these things. Right before that Christmas, I remember thinking that she didn’t look well again- she just had this look in her eyes that I could see her time was coming. She ended up going into the doctor because of this cough and he officially told my parents it wouldn’t be long.

She celebrated Christmas with us and we got her into the nursing home after. She wasn’t doing well. She did her best every day to show us she was okay though. She hated the breathing tube so took it out of her nose often. She also tried to be stubborn with doing stuff for herself but they installed an alarm on her bed that went off if she tried to get out on her own. She couldn’t breathe well and it was really hard for her to even walk to the bathroom.

We colored and played cards when she was up for it and visited often. I knew she was hanging on for something but knew it wouldn’t be long. Easter came around. I saw her that morning on my way to the inlaw’s home. I told her I would be back after the others visited. I knew everyone was coming and with our family that would be crowded in that nursing home. I gave her a big hug, she didn’t have much in her hugs in weeks. She smiled, she was so happy for everyone to be coming.

I stopped back to the nursing home, I heard mom had such a wonderful day. I came into the room and she could barely move. I knew it would be soon. I gave her a hug and she just hung on. It was her strongest hug in a very long time. I said, “it’s okay mom, you can go see grandma and grandpa. I’ll be okay”. She shook her head yes and just held on for a few mins more. She fell back to sleep and I left.

I called my sister who was the contact for everything and I said you call me the second you hear. She was like what do you mean? mom was so good today, she laughed, told jokes, and so full of life. I said, Kathy- it will be soon. I explained what happened tonight and she was a bit baffled but knew I was probably right. I got the text first thing the next morning and I jumped in the car and went straight out there. She was barely breathing and passed so beautifully in front of the few of us that were there. My sister who was travelling still, said she saw a light in the rain and knew what had happened. She was close. It was so beautiful.

It is so hard to lose a mother but also so hard to watch them suffer. My prayers are going out to my friend’s family. I pray that they find comfort in knowing that she led a good life and will be going onto her eternal life free from pain. My love goes out to all who have lost someone close to them or going through anything similar.

Sending All My Love!
Now tell me your story-

Week 2- Year of Marathon

This week was slower for me on the treadmill. I think I have a cold or at least been fighting one. I ended up taking off on Thursday, snow came through and I had to being Hermione to the vet for a followup after her surgery.

On Sat (the day I try to spend as much time as possible there), I started on the elliptical to try something different and see if that would help with timing. It did backfire on me slightly but only because I was right next to the fan and that flared up my allergies/ cold. I only made it 15 mins on that before switching to the treadmill. I did a lot of hills because I was struggling more with breathing after the fan thing… I finished my first book, which this has been great to do to keep me on the machines longer. I don’t think it helps much with the speed though. I ended the week gaining a mile. 12 weeks until my first race of the year… 20 until my first 1/2 marathon, and 38 weeks until the marathon. So I have to start gaining a mile in my longs runs pretty much every other week starting in Feb.

Sending All My Love!
Now tell me your story-

Week 1 – Year of Marathon

2018 has started off a bit on the rocky side. Monday was a tough run after celebrating the night before. I do not do well for a few days after staying up past 10 (really 9 but lately its been more like 10). I was on the treadmill for 47 mins but barely could do 3 miles.

Tuesday was yoga day and it really felt good to do this after yesterday’s workout. I started a 30 day series on You Tube. I also did 10 mins of Pilates abs. Wednesday- back to the treadmill. Today was much better but I couldn’t find my headphones which was not as bad as I was dreading it to be. I did 40 mins running and 20 walking on a incline fast paced. I did day 2 of yoga in the evening. The run was great but did get a bit tired at the end. Thursday is repeat run day but at slower pace. I was very sore this day so although I spent 56 mins at the gym, I was much slower- I was exhausted from sleeping hard too, not a great combo. Did day 3 of yoga that evening.

Friday is always yoga day. It was 33 mins this day and normally I aim for an hour total but did day 4 of the series and was still pretty sore. Saturday morning, I got up late, had my morning coffee and forced myself off to the gym- long run day. Got there and the parking lot was completely full. I mean even the school side was packed. I figured a mix of things going on here but thought fine, I’ll just go this evening. I headed out to visit my day and by the time I got home, I barely wanted to do my yoga routine but at least squeezed that in. Then made the excuse on Sunday that if I run, I’ll throw my next week’s run off so I just did yoga again.

Eating wise, I did okay. I haven’t started the Paleo but I’ve been doing better with avoiding cream in my coffee. This is hard. I’ve cooked more from home but did drive out to get a deep dish on Friday night. I need to start making this from home. I know it. I did pull out the pressure cookers last night and made an excellent version of our Chipotle Chicken and rice with veggies.

I do wonder how I’ll ever make it to marathon ready but at the same time, signed up for a couple more races that will make me want to run more sooner. No said it would be easy but I’m glad I have my journal to really take note of how I am feeling what I am doing and to try an work harder to the future. It is always just 1 step at a time and I know I can tackle anything I set my mind too even if my mind tries to counter it.

For those just starting out in running- imagine yourself doing it as much as possible. See the success and you will do it. Don’t let that piece of you that says nope never going to happen take over, counter it every time with a vision of your crossing that finish line. Start with the starting line, all those people around you, where you are starting, speed you want to go (I personally like the back so I can force myself slow at first than I do better over all), imagine the trail and those around you as you run, some will pass you and you will pass some, feel the breeze, see the hill, hear your music and even imagine the water stations, how you will run up to it, pause to grab a water cup, drink it down as your walking away, throw your cup and a way you go again. See that finish line now, now you push it forward, run more, you want to finish strong, you see that camera coming soon, try to smile with your body so you don’t look so dead in the photo (I hate how I look crossing the line every time- lol) and there you go, you did it!

Multiply this for longer races and you will get there. You can run and you can do this for your workout plans too. Get your mind wrapped around you doing this. You are strong.

Sending All My Love!
Now tell me your story-

It’s okay to cheat

on your diet people- get your head out of the gutter. I would never condone hurting another person or breaking a commandment.

I’m already seeing posts on how many have already cheated on their 2018 diet. Who cares? Seriously it is okay. Do not let this define you or beat yourself up about it. I’ve been there, done that. It gives you a great excuse to quit and are you a quitter??? No!

So yes, you had that delicious coffee treat that cost you 500 calories. oh man. or maybe it was those leftover Christmas cookie- so yummy. Nope, it was those delicious red velvet cupcakes that I made with the yummy cream cheese frosting (Am I a genius in baking or what?). Yes, we all do it but we cannot let it define us.

Today, we get up and start again- no I hate that as much as I hate the word diet. We continue on with our practice. We go out and exercise again, we continue eating clean today and we do not let 1 little cheat define our new year. I know I am not. I’m not letting the scale define me either but I’ll save that for a different day rant. lol

Now go out there and kick some butt!

Sending All My Love!
Now tell me your story-